Browsing Category

Lifestyle

Birthday, fitness, Happy,, Health, Lifestyle, May

Freaky Friday

You wake up on a regular day going about your mundane mindless business not knowing what it holds for you and isn’t that just exciting? Mine was the late hours of Thursday into Friday morning. Nothing about that day seemed like it’d turn out to be post worthy, I really thought the most exciting thing about that it would be my Asos delivery plus the fact that a friend of mine was in Abuja from out of town and had mentioned he was going to take me out to dinner in the evening for my birthday. Sounds normal and simple right? Jokes!

See if you ask me, I’d describe this friend as a – pretty chill, easygoing, normal, decent, Jesus boy – so nothing had my bells ringing. It was just dinner, catching up and good conversation and I was looking forward to it. He had meetings that ran later than expected so dinner got bumped up to a lot later than I planned, which was ugh because fitfam [I feel guilty about eating late these days but it was my birthday so…exception :D] However, we could still hang out and I get to drink my weight in calories. Ha ha.

So we ended up going out in a group of his friends and their friends and it turned out to be a group of us knocking back shots, cracking crazy jokes and laughing a lot plus off-key singing of happy birthday songs. I was having a great time. Then one of the guys goes – “Make we go dance for that our place”  and all the guys go “yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees” and I’m talking to myself like S, this is not the time to be a party pooper, it’s your birthday and you’re allowed to let your hair down. So we head to this place in Wuse 2 that looks NOTHING like a place anyone would refer to as “that our place”. The security guys do a check and after some muzzled convo, we are let in. Let me say, I pass this place on a regular and nothing about the outside suggests that something happens on the other side of the fence that requires muzzled conversation and a pass to get in, but I was about to learn. We enter a room that looks like an Asian restaurant and as I make to sit down, one guy goes – “E be like say today no dey happen” and the waiter goes “ehn Oga, today na off day”, the guys all sigh dramatically and the ring leader dude goes, “make we go, I sabi another place”; and so we all file back out into the car and head to the next spot.

PS: I later gathered that this spot is an exclusive spot for some level of debauchery that I don’t think I’m ready for. Good thing it was “off day” lol

So we all drive to the next spot, turns out to be a club and I’m already dreading the fact that my hair was going to reek of smoke [and sweat] for the entire next day but me no party pooper so we get in. Some huge guy comes out to shake hands with ring leader dude and greets the rest of us profusely and leads us towards a tiny spiral staircase that I hadn’t noticed. I’m thinking – nice, at least we won’t be stuck with the mogbo-moya group – lol. We get upstairs and are led into a second room that leads to another door covered in a suede fabric and I’m thinking – how many more doors before I find myself in Alice’s fantasy land? Is this a Nollywood script? Is this the end? – but I’m no chicken, so I continue in bravely. And we are in. Small room. Really small. With a pole in the middle and in that moment, I realize I’m in a strip room [not club], but I don’t want to jump the gun. Perhaps it’s a multipurpose room which doubles as an exclusive room for special guests who don’t want to mix sweat downstairs with plebs. Ha ha. . I can bet a lot of you Abuja people go to this club regularly without realizing what’s happening upstairs or maybe y’all know and i’m the lastma lady. Per usual.

Drinks are ordered, music is way too long for any type of conversation but people still insist on talking which leads to a lot of nodding & smiling even if you don’t hear a word of what’s being said. Like the person may just have said “your mama is a bitch”, but you’ll be nodding & smiling; not to mention the stray saliva in one’s ears. Ugh! Anyways, we are sipping our drinks and swaying to the extra loud music and next thing I know there’s a nyash in my face like bam! I swear guys, I didn’t see her approach, all I know is that my head was turned for a split second and next thing somebody’s asshole is in my face. Yes, an actual ass hole. The one where shit comes out from. Buck naked!!! OMGOOOODNESS!!! How do I act? Am I breathing too fast? Does my smile look fake? So many questions/emotions.

download (2)

My face!!

Let me just say, this is my first time ever in a strip anything in Nigeria so I was so more confused than anything . This isn’t the night I signed up for. Why is this female rimming my glass with her coochie? Why is she focused on me? Why not the men? I’m not buying this product, I’m straight. I later gather, she’d been instructed to please me as it was my birthday. I was mortified. Not because I’m the holiest but it just didn’t work. First off, the room was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too small, thus the girls were too close for comfort and/or any type of sexy. I was like we were doctors examining body parts and y’all know nothing looks sexy under a microscope. I swear if I looked hard enough, i’d probably see how many eggs their ovaries produced this month and how clean the Fallopian tubes are; Too close! I held my breath so much I thought i’d pass out at some point. I felt light headed. The girls took turns, each one mounting the pole and doing her number for about 10 minutes each and they ranged from the Naomi Campbell-esque to the thickums to the never-have-an-extra-burger type bodies. Because the room was so small, the Naomi Campbell types were a hazard to everyone on the room; with their swinging hair & 50 inch heels, when they attempt to swing on the pole, the whole room would duck. Lmao. One guy actually said – “ahn ahn, you wan throway my drink?” *real tears* The thickums worked for the twerking and the lose-the-burger types…..oh well *shrugs* But I guess they needed to cater to all kinds since taste varies [as though women are icecream flavours]

I may be wrong but isn’t stripping more about selling a fantasy and holding the room captive by peeling the ropes off one long salivating moment at a time? These girls here would mount the pole, shake shake shake then completely stop, stand up, then proceed to remove their bra & pants in the most unsexy manner, like how you’d take yours off after a long day back from work or like they were about to go and poop/enter the shower and then they’d tie it around the pole like [make e no come loss] or they’d toss it to another of their stripper friend waiting by the sidelines and say in a loud voice “abeg hol am for me”  because the music was quite loud. WTF?!!!! Zero build-up, Zero anticipation, Zero sexy. That wasn’t stripping. There was this one whose bra looked like a sports bra…. No kidding! I was more amused than irritated.

But the entire time I sat there, I was wondering what would make ANYONE choose such an occupation. There were two of these chics that had legs that are longer than my entire height, they’d give any model a run for her moolah and they could be so much more than just N200 tips. Nobody even tipped while were there, instead the guys were making rude/lewd comments every minute – “E be like say this one done born o, her breast don fall” “this one belle wan choke am” etc. I reckon the girls don’t even have direct access to the cash as the pimps are the middlemen. In that moment, I just wanted to serenade them with Drake’s – Marvin’s Room[I’m just saying that you can do better] – Later as I was discussing this with a friend, she mentioned that the actual cash doesn’t come from these Friday night little room performances but from the parties they get flown out for. She said that the little friday shindigs were more like an audition for the big[ger] fish.  I was thinking – not for these crop of girls sha. They didn’t quite cut it. But on the other hand, you see how the pimps live? Who do you think is maxing out?

Anyways after one too many nipple smacks, clit flicking and stuff I can’t even type here, I was ready to go home. The ring leader guy was like – “I bet we showed you a good time! Happy birthday – and I was like indeed sir! I’ll never forget this experience. Cringe!

Yesterday I sat in a car that drove past that building and I just smiled to myself like…… Na me biko! Then I sent a text to my friend saying – I underestimated you. He replied with a devil horn smiley. Smh

***

I signed up for another challenge on Nike run after getting an invite from Anu; called the 7 Day Madathon. This challenge was to complete, run and cover 40km between  4th – 11th May (7 days) and i’m super proud to inform y’all that I FINISHED FIRST!!!!!!! And here’s the kicker, I completed my 40kms in 2 days 8 hours. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas!!!!

IMG_5098.PNG            IMG_5362.PNG

Can I gloat? When I saw the 40km challenge invite, I thought to myself that this isn’t a challenge… I do this with my eyes closed. hahahahahahha… Super stoked that I won! I’m a sore loser, so i’m very happy to have won. Congrats to everyone else who participated, its okay to be second…or third… or…… Muahahahahahaaa 😛

***

I just returned from Benue where I ate pounded yam for breakfast, at lunch and at dinner. I kid you not! But I don’t even feel once small ounce of guilt, I don’t eat pounded yam often so when I get the chance, I use it well. My sister made this soup ehn… Best!!! And I got to meet the new addition to our family – Baby Afa – too precious. So now I have 4 babies, i’m a proud aunty. My quiver is indeed full.

Btw, May Challenge is still ongoing and I feel great! Are you moving? I hope so!

Have a nice week guys.

Love

S.

 

 


24 Comments

Birthday, Happy,, Life, Lifestyle, May

Happy Birthday To Meeeeeee

It’s my birthdaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy whoop whoop    


I love birthdays. I love forward to mine and I start counting down from like a month, striking off everyday with excitement like I am 5 and a half. I cannot even begin to understand those people who forget their birthdays. Like how is that even possible? Ha!

This year, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and my life is great! I thank God for all my blessings and I take none for granted.

Look at my google page today? It says “Happy birthday S” with tons of cake. How cute!

IMG_5042-1.JPG

And you know damn well I shall use an ATM today just so I can see my name and the accompanying birthday wishes flash on the screen. Ha ha.. xx

Happy birthday to all the people who share this special day with me and may God bless us all.

Birthday love xx

S.


16 Comments

Birthday, fitness, Health, Juicing, Lifestyle, wellness, Wishlist

May Challenge

Hi guys. 

As the title of this post indicates, I intend to do a fitness/diet challenge for the entire month of May. And I’d love for you guys to join me. Yes? Please say yes? You know you want to 🙂

After my misbehavior in Lagos, I came back home rearing to go back on the straight and narrow but I won’t lie, it’s not been all peachy clean. Between the birthday parties/dinners/lunch dates and random cookout invites *ahem Dooshima*, things have been quite windy. When I got an SOS from Dooshima, I knew it was the universe attempting to guide me back haha. So we both decided to start off on some type of regimen which we’ve managed to do for the last 2 weeks and while it’s generally been okay, I don’t feel like it’s enough because… my middle name is overkill. Plus I’m an all or nothing type person and honestly I’ve snoozed my alarm way too many times recently.

But it ends today!

Starting from tomorrow – 1st May [Best month ever!! Whoop whoop], we are going ham!!! Even though I’d probably eat tons of cake on the 4th because…. BIRTHDAY; it’s okay. I think just for that day, I’m allowed to faff, I mean, it’s my birthday. PS: Have you seen my birthday wishlist? It’s a real thing. I’m expecting awesomeness 😀

So what’s the plan for this challenge? It’s Simple! To cover 350 kilometers of jogging/running during the period of 30 days of the month of May.  DO NOT FREAK OUT!! This is a very realistic goal for 30 days. It just means covering the distance of approximately 12km everyday. Maybe more on weekends [if you please]. Don’t freak out! This target is very much achievable and you can do it. YES YOU CAN!!!!

What do you need? Just download the Nike run app on your smartphone/device  and add me via my username: Gorgeous Brownskin [obviously] 😉 and I’d invite you to the challenge once you’ve added me. that’s all! After that, every time you go out to jog/run, just launch you Nike app and it’ll automatically log in your workout stats and update it on the challenge board everyday. Simple as that! Very easy to use. Now if you want to use any other tracking app, it’s still okay, just as long as you maintain some type of accountability. But I’m hoping you choose the Nike app so I can enjoy looking at the challenge board as I kick your ass during this challenge ha ha. I’m an ass. Sorry.

Let’s do this!

During this challenge, I’ll be having a smoothie/green juice every morning for breakfast and a salad for dinner. You can find all you need to know about juicing here . Lunch will be a protein packed one – very important. and this will be so for all of May. I can’t stress enough the importance of maintaining a sensible diet while putting in all this work, it’ll be a shame if you workout so hard then ruin it with poor food choices so please endeavor to watch that. A very helpful tool I use to watch my choices is myfitnesspal app, it’s a very helpful resource. Read through that and get yours. 

In addition, I will be sharing my smoothies/juice combos/recipes on my Twitter timeline @GBTheBlog, so please follow follow follow. You don’t want to miss out on that. Remember to drink a lot of water in the course of your day during this challenge; preferably infused water and also have some green tea last thing before bedtime [even better if its infused with lemon and Apple Cider Vinegar]. Also, please, try not to eat anything after 8pm.

Before I forget, running/jogging is my exercise of choice but if it’s not your thing, feel free to infuse any other type of workout you prefer – Zumba, aerobics, spin, T25, yoga etc. The idea is to get active this month and it doesn’t matter how you’re doing it, as long as you are. If you have a calorie tracker, try hard to see over 1000 burnt everyday of this challenge. However, because its a challenge, you’re better off trying new stuff, even the ones you don’t particularly enjoy, so please jog/run with me. It’s not supposed to be a breeze but the sense of accomplishment you’d feel when its all over will be well worth it; not forgetting the svelte body – like there’s no way your clothes wont fit better after this challenge. Summer body loading!

I must warn you, i’m very competitive and so you should come ready :p I mean, I can tell you that it doesn’t matter if you don’t finish or complete your 350km because every little counts [and it truly does] but where’s the fun in that? Don’t you want to win this and win legitimately [The way I won my dear Humzz fair and square even as a rookie?] hahahahahahahahaha. So i’m really hoping you download the Nike run app and join me pronto 😀 This MAY CHALLENGE is to make sure everyone moves and eats consciously. Yes you can!

PS: Wont it be hilarious if one of you decides to whoop my ass at this challenge after all this mouth I’ve made? Don’t embarrass me please. lol. Infact No! You know what? BRING IT!!!!!! *stretches*

Have I missed out on any key information you need? Please ask me here in the comments box and/or on twitter anytime – @GBTheBlog. Don’t forget, I’ll share a lot on there everyday so follow and if you’re yet to subscribe to the blog and you want to, you’ll find the subscribe button on the top right corner of this page. 

Here’s to a kickass May. Let’s get to work.

Will you be joining me? Are you on board? Yes you are 😀

Your’s in sexy summer body

S.

Besos. XX

 

 


15 Comments

Birthday, fitness, Health, Juicing, Lifestyle, Travel, Wishlist

#MayThe4th Be With You

So guys…. Its officially Taurus season!! Whoop! Make way for the most beautiful [and usually vain] members of the zodiac. I cannot even try to deny this, all the taureans I know are proper vain *don’t look at me* A lot of my friends are Taureans too, which means every other day from today, I will most likely know someone who’s birthday it is up until about the end of May. Funners!
It’s my birthday in exactly 14 days and I keep alternating between feeling excited and having palpitations; but that’s not what I’m focusing on. I know you’re already thinking – “what will I get for my favourite girl Seember” :D, well wonder no more, I’ll make it super easy as I’ve narrowed down my endless wants into an easy list for you. Let’s get right to it.
1) India

Taj_Mahal_2012

See the Taj, experience the culture, eat roti canai, deep tissue massages….. need I say more? Plus, my girl Pav will be moving to the US with her new husband by July and has been hounding me to come visit before she leaves. Someone make this happen.
2) Dubai
images (5)

I need a vacay. NEED. Plus I haven’t flown with Emirates since they started flying out from Abuja and that’s a shame. No? After suffering with them through Lagos for many years, they’re finally in my city and I’m doing lastma? Not swanky! This has to change.

3) Iphone 6
apple-iphone-6-plus-gold-gallery-img-1-bp3-011215

Sometime in 2011, I pledged my allegiance to apple and became a loyal iSheep and I’ve not used any other product ever since. As a student with plenty extra money to spare, I often changed my phone just because! Again iSheep! Plus we all know how often new iphone models are debuted; but this time around, it’s not just for the fashunz/cool factor, I actually need it. My current one fell in water and has been acting crazy ever since. The buttons freeze, I miss calls all day, not because I’m away from the crazy phone but because the buttons just freeze and I just sit there staring at it while it rings until it stops; cant reply chats/messages, one app opens in another app like I’d open instagram and my twitter timeline will be showing..lol etc and people think I’m rude/ignoring them. If only…. So new iphone 6 NEEDED. Many thanks.
PS: I remember sometime last year on twitter, someone said, as a girl, if you buy your phones and perfumes by yourself, you’re a man. I had to find a corner to sit down and reevaluate my life because since I was born, I’ve never been gifted a phone, I buy all my gadgets myself with my own money. This year though, I don’t want to be a man any more. Eep me!
4) Perfumes
nd.18453 velvet_orchid_bottle_2 nd.5521 nd.18490download (1)
I think perfumes are the easiest gifts to give. Although they’re quite impersonal, they’re still very useful. Some say perfumes say – I don’t know you well enough/don’t care to put a lot of thought into this gift/ but I know you’ll still appreciate this – And I do. I’m currently loving Si by Giorgio Armani, Velvet Orchid by Tom Ford, Ysl’s La Nuit, Tuscan Leather/ Plum Jarponais– Tom Ford etc. This list is by no means exhaustive. Feel free to surprise me with your own pick too, Options are a good thing 😀
Plus, as that twitter person said, I no longer want to be a man this year.

5) Nutribullet
811XBaEo4EL._SL1500_
You guys know I’ve become the juicing queen and my poor juicer is beginning to sound like I do when I’m climbing the stairs. Like … warning… quarter to pass out. Lol. This one will actually mean you’re making sure I hit my target weight by my 6 month mark, so consider this your contribution to my fitfam journey. Plus, there’s nothing sexier and slinkier than a nutribullet in the land of juicers, its premium grade A stuff and so so convenient. No mess at all.
WANT! NEED! GOTTA HAVE IT!!!!!!! Please.
You can find it here or here. Many many thanks

6) Polar heart rate monitor

                  

This is a need that I’ve been putting off for a while because I was making do using my phone via the Nike run app as a guestimate for my workouts. However, now that my phone has packed up, it’s become even more imperative that I get a polar watch. Again… fitfam, 6 month target, every little helps. Find it here or here or via Instagram – @WaistedNation

7) Asos giftcard
asosgiftcard
I could upload the link to the stuff I like on the Asos site but why stress when you can just send me a giftcard and I’ll get to clicking by myself? Easy. Fast. Convenient. I love. I Reeeeeeeeeaaaalllllllyyyyyyy want this. Click here to access the site.
8) Gym membership

I run around my neighborhood for the most part but it’s become necessary to include regular gym sessions into my workout regimen so as to switch things up. Also this way, I could include strength training into my regimen as I’ve been told that this is the only way I won’t lose too much breast tissue – which is the downside of regular running. ME I DON’T WANT SAGGY BOOBS!!!!! I love my boobies, they’re my babies. So I need to get back into the gym regularly. 1 month, 3 months, 6 months. You pick. I’d appreciate any. 😀

***

Okay I’ll stop here. Not because I don’t want more stuff but I’m beginning to feel greedy ha ha. If you look at my list, it’s made up of more stuff pertaining to my new attempt at a healthier lifestyle, and I’m just marveling at myself. I wrote a birthday wishlist without cake/chocolate/shoes/plenty vanity; Lord, I have grown up!!! But my dear friends, do not be limited by the above, it may be restrictive but I’m very open to accepting anything that’s not on this list… with a huge smile and a gracious heart.

Infact, when it comes down to it, credit alert is the absolute best. Oh yes! Don’t be shy.

Is my wishlist too ambitious? Brethen believe me when I tell you…. Confession is possession. Come with a generous spirit 😀
Many Thanks.

Besos xx
PS: My birthday is on the 4th of May [just incase you missed my uber witty post title]


6 Comments

Easter, Election, fitness, Holiday, Lifestyle, Nigeria, Randomness, Travel

Lagos….

Last Tuesday, my phone rang; it was my dear friend Shola… We chit-chatted about everything mundane as we usually do and as she’s about to end the call, she goes – “you should visit one of these days”; I just laugh and say okay, I’ll see about that. But then after the conversation ended, I thought about it a bit more and wondered, why ever not? Its Easter in a few days, a long weekend/holiday looms, I enjoy my visits to Lagos [infrequent as they are], I enjoy the downtime, I enjoy the change in scenery etc, so why not?! I didn’t need to be cajoled, sold! Couple of hours later, I had booked a flight and was ready to step. Lagos here I come.

  

Photo Credit: My brother. Gracious enough to indulge a vain sister but still serving me a side eye.

Once I knew what Easter was saying, I had to admit to myself that this would be a tough week/transition period fitness wise.  Because I’m mostly a homebody, I don’t have much temptation food-wise because I’ve cleaned out my house/fridge but how can I be in Lagos and not try everything I see? Eep me!

Matter of fact, I had to stop by Wuse 2 briefly to see a friend before I headed out and as we stood by Globacom office talking, the KFC building directly opposite was like “Hey S… long time no see, why you play me like this? We used to be tight” And I didn’t want to be rude so I obliged an old friend. I got in there like “Hey guuuuuuuurl… How you doing? Can I get a 2 piece original with fries and a DIET PEPSI?”…. That pretty much set the tone/pace for my entire Easter weekend. I CHOP!!!!!!!! You’re laughing at yourself okay. 😛

Delays to be accounted for [per usual], I got into Lagos a whole 5 hours later than expected and my tired oily face says it all… Still cute though 😉

  

When I tell you I hit the ground running, I truly did. Inspiro Galeria hooked me up, fitfam be damned! Yum!

Wait! Have I told you guys about Inspiro Galeria? No?… Alright. Listen!!!!!! This quaint galleria is a real gem; a one stop spot for the guy/girl wey sabi ha ha.

IMG_4181.PNG

There’s an art section where you can browse and buy some aesthetically amazing art pieces

  

There’s also a gift section which carries some of the most beautiful gift ideas ever – candles, unique home decor, fragrances, books, beddings, mugs etc. If you’re ever stuck for ideas, there’s someone on hand to walk you through different options. You’re guaranteed to find something your loved ones will appreciate.

IMG_4180.PNG IMG_4178.PNG IMG_4179.PNG

Inspiro also has a cafe which serves mouth watering meals, drinks and cocktails. Best mojitos ever! My mouth is watering just looking at these pictures all over again. Yummmmmmmmmm!!!

IMG_4183.PNG IMG_4175.PNG IMG_4176.PNG IMG_4182.PNG IMG_3964.JPG IMG_4174.PNG

So basically, you [and your friends/loved ones] can come to Inspiro, have a nice meal with drinks while browsing art and gift options. What’s not to love? Very convenient too. Little wonder it is a hit for intimate birthdays, dinners and different events, simply call – 08069072963/08170105105/08060805404 for reservations or inquiries. Inspiro galleria is open monday-saturdays at 9am-10pm[can be flexible on request]. It is located at No.1 Joseph Nahman Close, Off Karimu Kotun. Victoria Island, Lagos. You can also browse and follow their social media pages – Twitter: @InspiroGaleria ; Instagram: inspiro_galeria.  If you’re visiting, remember to say I tipped you, who knows, a nice discount may just be yours 😀

***

I managed to workout twice while I was in Lagos but i’m pretty sure all the stuff I ate cancelled it out. I’m not even ashamed to admit that I misbehaved. Just look at some of my choices…. But is there fitfam in heaven? This life that we are living, ees only one *Mama Peace voice* iChop!

 

  IMG_4141.JPG

**Abuja…. You need a sushi bar, why you dey slack so badly? hiss**

Besides stuffing my face, the rest of my trip was spent doing my waka waka rounds, seeing everyone I planned to see and taking endless selfies/pictures while at it. Y’all know i’m vain… Not sorry 😛

         

Anyways, I’m back to normal programming now and while Lagos was plenty fun, I’m so happy to be back to my life. My bed. My routine. Lagos can take a toll on one, everything is so damn fast and I find that many of the interactions/people can be quite bougie. I like that we tend to take things easy here in the Buj, definitely more my vibe. I never want to have to live in Lagos permanently.

I’ve juiced two bottles of orange juice, made a mango/greek yoghurt smoothie and re-stocked the fridge with veggies. Then I had this for dinner yesterday, in atonement for all my sins of gluttony. Dear god of fitfam, please receive your humble servant back in the fold.  We’re back in business!

Gubernatorial elections are here – Saturday, in light of which you may find some of the stuff in here helpful. Please stay safe out there guys.

So how did you spend your Easter holiday? Gimme gist 😀

Peace and love.

Cheers xx

S.


15 Comments